Posted by Leli on December 23, 1998 at 06:56:04:
In Reply to: Re: Struggeling with my faith posted by Emily on December 23, 1998 at 03:51:41:
thanks for replying, and for sharing.
In the end of your reply you wrote "Share your pain" I don't think I can share this pain with the youths, but I'm sharing it with some other people. And by sharing it, it is getting a little bit easier. Not much, but anyway. Just knowing that somebody listens helps a lot. Also to know that somebody else is praying, even though most of it right now is words, only words. But I have experienced in the past that prayers really make a difference, so prayers are welcome.
The thing that broke my heart is all the memories from me being abused. It happened 10-15 years ago, and I've pressured it all down, but now they are coming back, and I'm dealing with them this time. The memories have been coming to the surface for about a year now, and there are still new memories coming... You said that "all things that happen are good to those who love the Lord", but I can't see anything good in all of this...
I guess that things are a little bit harder than usual for me right now. Tomorrow my husband and I will go to my parents. We'll stay there over Christmas. There is a posibility that I will meet one of the men who hurt me when we go to church there... He doesn't live there anymore, but he often visits the church my parents go to.
Once again, Thank you for your reply and for your prayers.