Posted by Mike on August 27, 1998 at 20:04:44:
In Reply to: How do I start to forgive my self? posted by Kim on August 12, 1998 at 19:10:54:
Kim,
Sitting in church on Sunday a church elder related a story much like yours. About 8 years ago he and his wife felt called by God to go on a mission to Mexico. In short they bought a small van-chassis motor home, rallied support from the members, and set out for Mexico after about 6 months of planning. They left the church at about 5:30 that morning with about 6 youths who'd volunteered to go on the month long summer mission. Only an hour into their trip disaster struck. A larger motor home passed them on the highway and the wind rushing past started to make their vehicle swerve out of control. The van entered the median and flipped over. Needless to say there were many injuries, and luckily none were fatal. The question is how could God let something so horrible happen to people doing work in His name!? Now, I can't put it in terms that are as clear as the elder did but simply put, our God is a sovereign God. He does not punish us for our faults but leads the course of the universe according to His will. We cannot make judgement on why things happen, we can only accept them and search for faith. Many Christians came to the elder and said it happened because he didn't pray enough or that he was being punished for his previous sins. None of which is true. God loved us so much that He gave us His only son and allowed Him to die for us. What an awesome sacrifice and one which we cannot comprehend. We are the sheep in God's flock and we are sacrifices for Him when he chooses. Nothing we can do can stop that.
Believe in the sovereignty of God and in the love of Jesus for you. What you see as sin, God forgives through His son. Having this kind of faith is not easy and I am just learning about it too. You must die to your own wants and needs each day and believe that everything will be provided for you. This doesn't mean you can lie in bed all day and live as a hermit for the rest of you life. God expects us to work and do as He instructs. Rejoice that we have a Lord who gave up His life for us. You will begin to see things as you never have before. Blessings will show themselves to you in ways you could not imagine.
I hope this helps you in some way. Keep the Lord in your heart and you cannot go wrong. God bless you. I will keep you in my prayers.
Sincerely,
Mike