Posted by Connie on November 24, 1998 at 09:56:26:
I carried so much hate and anger for my now former husband. When I took a business trip to Florida for 5 days last August, he took up with not one woman, but two. This took place in our home. There were two violations here; the betrayel of his faithfulness and the betrayel of the sanctity of our home. Both were equally difficult to swallow.
I was angry. I set out on a destructive path that would have ended up hurting me, not him. He blamed me for his behavior.
One day, I realized that I could no longer continue with my focus in life being "how to bring down this man". I asked God to provide me with the answers that I needed to overcome this and I knew that forgiveness was the only answer to be had. But how to find forgiveness for someone who has caused me such devastation.
I called up my husband and told him I had allot of hate and anger for him. He said he knew. I asked him if he could help me with it. He agreed. I met him in a neutral location. We talked. I cried. I began to leave feeling incomplete in my mission for figiveness. Before I got into my car, he asked me if he could hug me. Reluctently, I agreed. While he was hugging me, he said "I'm sorry". I said, "for what". He said "for hurting you". That was it for me. That was all i needed to hear. From that moment on, I was able to move on with my life. Granted, I cannot excuse what he did or ever trust him again. I will not have him in my life as I have no trust for him, but I was released. I know that we cannot all have this type of ending in our search for forgiveness, but it is the actual knowing that the search is necessary that can begin our healing.