Posted by Robin on August 04, 1998 at 23:39:08:
7yrs ago my husband committed adultry with my friend. He came to me and I forgave him and he accepted Jesus. He promised to never hurt me again like this for he saw the pain it caused me. Now I was confrunted in Jan. that he wanted a divorce because he wasn't in love with me anymore. I immediately said he was having an affair he to me he did that and he wasn't going to do that again. By the end of the month after much arguing he said ther was someone else but he wasn't having an affair. I found out and confrunted him and he denied continually. He finally told me that he was having an affair and I was crushed. He lied over and over for 5 months with anger towards me and physical violence. I became anorexic and basically not funtioning. I spent my whole life with this man(19yrs) and had 4 beautiful children my ranging from 15 to 7 I was determined to get him to repent and he said he did but he loved another married women. He beat me badly in May and put a knife to my throat and I told him to go ahead and kill me. He did't and left. I was in a state of shock and could not believe this was the same man I dedicated my life to. I had a hard time coming to grips with mostly how could he do this to our children. He is with his married lady and filled divorce after I finally got a restraining order against him because he continually told me I was crazy and I was going to die. Now he said I ruined his life and he can't afford anything.( he still gets half his paycheck and I was raising 4 children on the other half because I quit my job and got a part time job making less money because of the stress from his continuous lying). My oldest son threatened to kill us last week if he had to live with us and ran away. I thought it would be best because the other 3 were stating that he would hurt them when I wasn't around and in front of Dad and Dad didn't do anything about it.It is the hardest decision I had to make and his father said it's my fault. He is jtrying to justify all he is doing with this married woman and these are not the values I want my chilren to learn. It is very painful for all of us. It is very hard to forgive this man with his continuous lies about me to my chilren and me. His promises are all empty and I have the need to forgive. How can I forgive him with his continuous lies and pushing this woman into my childrens lives? Please help me as I pray and try to stay in the will of God but sometimes the pain takes me over and I know I don't get through without God. Please keep my family in prayer and God bless you all with your responses